Party of 6

Corrie and I both grew up in a family of four. Our parents were never outnumbered by children. We are outnumbered by children. Our family is big and can sometimes be loud and comes with a lot of stuff. However we have recently figured out that due to the size of our family, or maybe the fact we have two babies, we are not being included or invited to things. To me this is hurtful and rude. Corrie however said maybe its something we need to get used to. I just don’t get it. If someone wants an event kid free just tell us and we will find a sitter if we can. Let us make that choice though, don’t make it for us by not inviting us.

Maybe I am being to sensitive?! This just came about again a couple of days ago and each time we realize what happened it stings a little for me. It makes me wonder why. It makes me question friendships. But it never makes me question the size of my family.

16 thoughts on “Party of 6

  1. Wait, WHAT?! I cannot imagine not inviting you to something simply because you’re a big family. Maybe people figure you wouldn’t want to/be able to attend because there’s so many of you and it’s so much work?

    What are the situations/events that you’re not being invited to? That really sucks and I am so sorry. 😦

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    • One was a birthday party and the other is an upcoming annual event that we have been to in the past. Sometimes it is a TON of work but we always try and make the best effort we can even if that means only going for a short time.

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    • Then don’t have 3 more…ha! We have lost some friends when having kids because we can’t stay out late or be gone on all day excursions and what not. I guess life just changes but that isn’t saying it still doesn’t like you said..suck!

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  2. It’s so crazy but I have the exact feelings only an opposite situation, all my friends have kids and they have lots and lots of events but never invite me, because I don’t have kids to add to the group. I finally just outright mentioned it to them, and they have been making more of an effort to include me, but man it hurts to be ostracized either way! Kids or no kids…. People clearly need lessons in manners and including people in activities. But unfortunately we can’t control their actions, we can only take it as a lesson in what not to do. I wish people would give everyone in their “group” the option instead of assuming that they wouldn’t attend for whatever reason…. And end rant…. πŸ™‚ hope it works out and you are able to find clarity in how to approach these things… Sometimes directness is the only way to go…

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  3. We have one kid and the invites have declined. It sucks. I’m sorry. I agree you should be given the choice.
    Before I had a child I threw my sister’s baby shower and wedding and at both I hired entertainment for the kids and planned the event with kids in mind which surprised people with kids and I didn’t really understand why they were surprised until I had a kid and stopped getting invites to parties.

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    • Wow that was really great of you. Most people would not think of that at all even if they have kids..ha! When we have “adult” gatherings I always think of who will be bringing kids and make sure to have kid friendly food. It really does make a difference.

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  4. OUCH! That would sting me too. Being kidless, I’ve struggled with how not to offend parents when I do want to host a kid-free event. Maybe some of your friends are feeling that way too.

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  5. We just went through this New Year’s Eve. My CLOSEST AND BEST FRIENDS, all went out to one of those new silent club parties, completely failing to invite us. When I confronted them? “We thought you’d say no because of all the kids and it being the boys fire New Year’s Eve.” Believe me, I know the feeling, and it’s frustrating and irritating, and I refuse to get used to it!

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  6. I was kid-less for 35 years of my life and had friends who had kids and friends who didn’t. When I had kids suddenly all my friends disappeared…the ones who had kids now had older kids…and even though I was there as their friend when their kids were little, once I had kids they disappeared. Very frustrating and I totally get where you are coming from. I was a family of 7…one child has moved out so now we are a family of 6 and I have begun to realize that all that matters is the family I have made.

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